Oops, We Developed a Squirrel Army
We saw a potential friend in Pumpkin the squirrel and focused on winning her over.
In 2022, I met Pumpkin.
A grey squirrel inhabiting our backyard, Pumpkin’s curiosity made her stand out.
Partial to sitting on our fence posts, she’d scurry away anytime our cars entered the driveway. Over time, we noticed her sticking around on the fence when we came home.
Her life greatly improved when we put a bird feeder in the backyard tree. Nimble and intelligent, she navigated the feeder with ease, hanging upside down by her little toes.
During summer 2024, she familiarized herself with Dave as he worked on backyard chores or tended to his garden. I remember Dave running excitedly into my office to share how Pumpkin let him stroke her tail.
This breakthrough changed everything.
We saw a potential friend in Pumpkin and upped our focus on winning her over.
Pumpkin’s pumpkins
We leave out our carved pumpkins for our backyard friends. This offering solidified us as Very Cool Dudes in Pumpkin’s eyes, adding a small layer of trust, and inspiring her name.
We took this familiarity further by putting snacks on our porch steps every morning, ensuring she saw. We were dramatic with our movements because we wanted Pumpkin to know US = 🥜🍞🧇🥰
And, well, lookie here. It worked.
With the weather warming, I had more incentive to sit outside with Pumpkin during snack time. When she began turning her back to us while gnawing away we knew we made significant progress. Comfortable leaving us in her blind spot, Pumpkin no longer saw us as major predators.
Meanwhile, I was loving every second.
Have you ever seen a squirrel eat up close? It is absolutely adorable. My summer days were spent transfixed on watching Pumpkin snack her way through our backyard. Soon, our presence became so familiar that she started sharing the porch steps with us.
My depression weapon
As many readers know, I went through a giant loss a few months ago. Two weeks after we said goodbye to our dog, Pumpkin began eating from our hands—a little more than a year after we intentionally started to befriend her.
We were slow and patient, first holding out apple slices and other snacks she could snatch from a distance. We planned to get her to associate our hands with goodness and bounty.
It worked.
She got comfortable being hand-fed in November and was running up to our open, peanut-filled palms by December. Every morning is Christmas.
So, this is around where I expect some “crazy white lady” comments to come flying in, followed by some comments about rabies. While I take full accountability for being a crazy white lady, I’m gonna need to dispel the rabies myth with some research.
A study conducted between 1995 and 2010 found only nine (0.04%) of the 21,977 squirrels tested were rabid. The most likely rodent to carry rabies? The groundhog.
Even with this knowledge, I created some personal rules for handling a wild squirrel:
Understand squirrel body language and which movements are aggressive so I can be aware of her mood while she eats.
Sit on the porch and allow Pumpkin to make the move. If she doesn’t want to come to me, that is her prerogative.
Be cautious when another squirrel approaches.
Always wash hands when done hanging out.
Pumpkin returns our gentleness by placing her little front paws in our hands while eating. She is docile and exudes a sweet energy that makes me think she enjoys our time together. (A lie I’m ready to believe forever.)
Eventually, Pumpkin put it together that the treats were coming from inside our house. Impatient Pumpkin now regularly appears on our porch, ready to accept her gifts. She’s even tried to take it further.
One day I heard Dave yell “No, no! Pumpkin, stop!” from the kitchen.
Pumpkin was ready to cross the threshold and step into our home.
This happens often. We will open our back door to check on the squirrels and have Pumpkin rush up to our feet, curious to see the great beyond, or at least her version.
My favorite day was when Pumpkin figured out she could knock on the door to get our attention. Her knocks are not mighty knocks by any means, but the little taps are loud enough for me to pause the dishes and investigate.
Many developments happened this winter. She began answering to her name, connecting “Pumpkin” with food. If she’s within earshot and hears “Hey Pumpkin!” she will immediately head toward the porch.
It. is. wild.
Oops, we developed a squirrel army
So, Pumpkin has some kids.
In May 2024, we noticed two small squirrels regularly hanging out in our backyard and put it all together—Pumpkin had babies. What JOY.
We kept referring to the babies as “Small Fry” and “Pipsqueak,” so their names officially became Fry and Pip. They’ve never known a world without porch snacks.
Fry and Pip are fun to watch because Fry is an asshole and Pip is the reason “squirrely” is an adjective. One time, I saw Pumpkin beat Fry’s ass and that felt like justice for all the times he was a menace. I hope Pip saw.
The kids are comfortable with us but not to the extent Pumpkin is. Fry will take food from our hands once in a while and Pip has ventured to our palms two or three times.
We’ve noticed that the weather determines how they behave with us. If we have steady weather, they are friendlier. If the weather forecasts precipitation or a temperature swing, they focus on their food reserves. We call this “getting serious.”
Word spread about our snack haven and attracted two more regulars, Phil and L.L. I don’t know their deal. Phil could be Pip and Fry’s dad and I have no idea where L.L. came from. In fact, her name is an abbreviation of “Little Loner” because she started hanging out on the fringes and didn’t interact with the others. Sad!
I started going out of my way for L.L. I noticed she was out earlier and later than the others, meaning she got their scraps instead of a full snack buffet. I took note of these times and ensured she got a proper feast. Making the connection between her snack and its source, she is comfortable coming within five feet of me. I look forward to that distance closing but am thrilled with L.L.’s evolution. She is now friends with Pip!
Summer has been on my mind all winter because it means more opportunities to get to know our squirrels. We’re also looking at different squirrel houses to put on our porch so our kids are safe and secure.
We are also certain Pumpkin is currently tending to new babies, which we will likely see around May or June. A few weeks ago, we noticed her habits changed. Instead of feeding during the late morning and early afternoon, she began scavenging between 5 and 7 p.m. Also, her nipples are huge now.
Pumpkin’s attitude toward us is different as well. Instead of choosing to eat out of our hands 80% of the time, it’s now closer to 50%. While I miss seeing her as frequently, I understand her hesitancy and am anxious with excitement to see new Frys and Pips running around, further strengthening our squirrel army.
Oh my gosh, what will we name them??
This is disgustingly cute. I'm squirrel-squeeing over here. It takes me back to last spring-summer, when the cat family was living on our porch. :)
Lindsay, I've been reading your blog for a few months now. What excellent writing! I too was at the Creed concert in GR and had many of the same reactions and thought you shared!
This particular post about the squirrels was delightful! When I was little, my grandfather had 'tamed' a couple squirrels at their summer cottage. I was in awe at seeing them eat from his hand! Thanks for a joyful break from my regular work! I enjoyed this greatly! Dan Steinhart (the elder)