America, the Beautiful?

I shouldn't love this holiday but I do.

I haven’t been this patriotic since.

It’s the Fourth of July!

I shouldn’t love this holiday, but I do. I love it so much.

I love the Fourth of July because I was fortunate to grow up on a lake. Everyone familiar with lake culture knows the Fourth is THE lake holiday. It is lake season’s pinnacle event and there is nothing summer has to offer that can top it.

Witness the culture of my people.

I celebrate this holiday fully, despite my complicated feelings toward my country. I stand firm in my belief that America holds some of the most diverse and beautiful sights on Earth. I also stand firm in my belief that this country is one of the most evil on Earth.

After last week’s presidential debate, I think many people feel similarly. In the same week, the Supreme Court went on a cruelty spree, ruling cities can ban people from sleeping outside, leaving homeless communities with little to no options.

I’m not even done yet.

What the U.S. flag will look like in 150 years.

SCOTUS also gave presidents “absolute immunity,” which means it is likely Trump’s criminal case will not go to trial.

Meanwhile, two-thirds of American voters support a permanent ceasefire in Gaza. They are begging, even taking extreme measures, to get President Biden’s attention. He won’t listen. He didn’t listen when it came to safe and legal abortions, despite American voters being in favor of legalized abortions as well.

So yeah, I sometimes feel weird getting turnt up for America.

I’m excited for today, though. My high school friends are spread out across the country and many are coming back to our hometown to celebrate. We’ve been more mindful about getting together in recent years, which has strengthened our bond even more.

If I were on speaking terms with my dad, I’d stay at my childhood home. Instead, I am staying in my best friend’s childhood home. It’s a happy place for me, serving as a second home most of my life. I’m excited to be part of her family again.

Reflecting on these complicated feelings has taught me an important lesson: you cannot take away someone’s roots. It has been four years since I last stepped foot in my childhood home but my presence is very much alive.

I still see my childhood friends, stepping into the same homes I did more than 30 years ago. Our parents wave to each other. They ask how the kids are doing, what their summer plans are, yadda yadda. A childhood neighbor has even become a long-term client of mine. Invisible yet strong, my roots will only go away when I do. A powerful lesson, indeed.

Our dad spent so much on fireworks over the years that he has at least 3-5 free shirts. He also made special trips to Ohio for the better (illegal) fireworks.

Likewise, I cannot change my relationship with this country. It is where my roots began and where they have stayed. It’s a confusing place to be but I’m learning two things can exist. I can be terrified for our country’s future while also being excited to see my first Red Rocks concert. It’s not ideal, but it helps me get by.

So, I will continue to celebrate what I know is true: my friends and our love for one another, being on a boat before noon, my best friend’s parents and their love for me and an environment that brings up happy memories instead of sad ones.

May you have bright sun, clear skies and enough drinks on your boat today.

I live with chronic migraine, which affects how much work I can take on. On average, I lose one workweek a month to migraine attacks. Not a Fit for Our Publication is my way to raise funds to manage my disease while offering something in return. You can help me out by subscribing to Not a Fit for Our Publication, sharing the website, sharing a free blog post and gifting a subscription.